Stumble It!
Titbits from Elsewhere
Satellite Navigation
My thanks to prolific blogger Keith K, for the following piece, published on his blog, "Travelrat's Travels" recently. Keith also occasionally writes for Helium.
In the early 1990s, I was given a piece of kit to assist with my work. The Global Positioning System, or GPS. I wasn’t impressed.‘How is it’ I asked ‘that the bloody thing only works when I know where I am anyway?’
Nowadays, it’s the in-car navigation system, SATNAV, which, it is claimed, will do everything except put coins in the parking meter at your destination. However, we’ve all heard those horror stories about big trucks and coaches being directed along unsuitable roads, even railway lines and riverbeds.
I will admit SATNAV is a useful tool … but, like Wikipedia, any information you get from it should be treated as guidance, rather than set-in-concrete gospel. I think, for instance, of the time it announced ‘You have arrived at your destination’ at the end of a narrow lane, with an unmade track leading from it into the forest.
To be fair, if I’d continued along that track for a mile or so, I would have arrived at the restaurant I sought …but, I wouldn’t have given much for my suspension afterwards. Instead, I reached for the road atlas.
However, SATNAV won’t hear of you going this route. I swear, if you decide to follow the road-signs, instead of obeying its instructions, the voice gets shriller as it screeches ‘Turn around NOW !!!’ at you. And, do I detect an air of resignation when it finally decides to work out a new route from where you actually are …sort of ‘All right! If you insist!’
I have one thing to say about it. I don’t know where the quote came from, but for a long time, it’s been one of my favourites:
‘He who never got lost, never went anywhere’
Colin Morley (editor)
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British Motto? Anybody? No?
I am deeply indebted to Harry Aldridge for allowing me to reproduce the following from his blog, "Curious Snippets from a Cynical Optimist" Harry's writing can also be found at Helium.com
"Britain: At least it's not France/Germany/America (delete as appropriate)"
"Britain - all it needs is a coat of paint"
"Smile! You're on CCTV"
"It never rains but it pours"
"Error 404 - Latin Translation Server Gateway Timeout"
"Pandemonium ad Asbo"
"Float Like A Butterfly, Sting Like A GB"
Have any better ones? I think Uruguay has it nailed with their motto "Libertad o Muerte" (Liberty or Death), although unfortunately this no longer applies to Britain. My own contributions below..
"Britain: Made in China"
"Britain: Weak and Easily Manipulated"
"Britain: Welcome Comrades"
"Britain: We used to rule your ass!"
"Britain: A State of Decline"
"Britain: Vorsprung Durch Technik"