The Old Hack

Yesterday was a milestone for The Old Hack.  How was it celebrated?  In the usual fashion, really.  After breakfast I fancied a smoke, went outside and did not have a cigarette.  A milestone?  Well yes, actually.

A year ago I finished breakfast and had my usual cigarette.  I felt unusually short of breath.  The odd smoker's cough I could tolerate, but this was different.  And my body ached all over.  I put out the cigarette before I had finished it, and went to work in my office in North West London.

As the day went on, I felt progressively worse, didn't smoke my usual hourly cigarettes and took myself home at lunchtime.  I spent the rest of the day in bed, feeling dreadful, not eating and feeling like this was the worst dose of flu I had ever had.  At some stage in the late evening, I must have fallen asleep.

I woke at 3am, seemingly unable to breathe and with a dreadful pain in the left side of my chest.  I woke Mrs Old Hack, who had the good sense to get me to the local Accident and Emergency hospital with a minimum of delay.  I spent the following nine days in a hospital bed - though I am only really aware of the last four of those.  It seems I had contracted Legionnaire's Disease while on a short break in the South of France the week before.

I made a vow from my hospital bed, even before my condition was diagnosed, that I would not smoke any more.  And I have kept that vow for the past year.

The air that I breathe is generally sweeter these days, though I can't be too sure as I don't have much sense of smell (nothing to do with smoking, oddly enough).  On days when I can smell, cigarette smoke is quite revolting.

So why, after a whole year and now thankfully fully recovered from my illness, do I still yearn for a cigarette almost every day?  I understand that the addictive chemical, nicotine, is expunged from the body after just a couple of weeks.  I guess the brain is a more complex organ than any of us can fully understand - and mine is really angry with me for giving up smoking after   more than forty years!  Thankfully Mrs Old Hack, who has never smoked herself, is delighted.

I don't recommend Legionnaire's Disease as a means of quitting smoking.  I do, however vouch that the air that I breathe is healthier, cleaner and much, much cheaper than before.

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